Anya's Swimathon

Anya did her first ever sponsored swim last week - although she wasn't really sponsored (there was only one sponsor - me!) and she didn't exactly swim. She floated. Nevertheless, she did look extremely cute in her little wet suit and swimming cap. Not everyone is supportive of Anya's swimming lessons though. Despite assuring Benedicta that the pool is heated, she still regularly shouts after us that swimming is dangerous and bad for your health.

Beware the Bierfest

It was the Deutsche Schule Bierfest on Saturday. Hermann and Thomas have now scientifically proven that you cannot mix beer, schnapps and whiskey without horrific consequences. It was not a pretty sight.

The Wonderful World of Home Affairs

Conventional wisdom states that the British invented the queue. Well, the Durban Home Affairs department have elevated the queue to a whole new art form. Would you believe it - I've now been in SA for a whole year - and that means it's visa renewal time. So off to Home Affairs we went. And then we queued: we queued to collect the forms; then we queued to submit the forms; a week later we queued to submit the passport for stamping; and then we returned at the specified time to collect the passport.....only to find out that the Home Affairs office had closed an hour earlier. Just for a laugh they made us queue outside for another hour before telling us to go home. The next day we again returned at the appointed time. We handed in our names so that they would know which passports to process first. We waited some more. By this time the Blitz spirit had taken over and the atmosphere was remarkably jolly. We waited another hour. The lady came out. Read out a few names. No takers. We handed in our names again. Finally at 5pm (closing time and the equivalent of Home Affairs high noon)the lady appeared again and my name was the first to be read out. In keeping with my newly aquired African Spirit (see earlier blog) I did a victory cheer and dance up the aisle to collect my passport - much to the delight and amusement of my fellow inmates. And the good news? They gave me 2 years before I have to go back and queue some more.

The Daily Sun

Living in Africa can be really depressing at times. You only have to listen to the stories coming from Zimbabwe - or closer to home in Cato Ridge - and it makes you want to reach for your passport and get the hell out before you come face to face with a panga wielding loony. Add in load shedding, the AIDS crisis and the ever present poverty and crime problems and it's no wonder most people have an exit plan in place. On the other hand, most people will also remind you that Africa is a place of contrasts and for every voice of pessimism there is an equal voice of optimism. I have therefore decided to embrace the 'spirit of Africa'. My plan? READ THE DAILY SUN! It's the African equivalent of the News of the World and it is completely hysterical. Yesterday it headlined with "When a Pig is a Lion" warning readers not to be duped by conmen selling fake lion's blood. It also included a report about a mlungu (white person) living in a shack and a girl who woke up married. The evidence for this wedding was one very small ring that had been squeezed onto one exceptionally fat finger. To be honest, it looked like her finger was about to fall off and one can only surmise that she sold her story to pay for the impending medical bills.